Very often I am faced with parents asking how to get their kids to clean up their rooms. They often appear frustrated and you can hear the exasperated tone when they say, “I bought you all those bins, you know where things go.” Recently a friend, who writes a very informative and funny Dad blog, brought up the question of “Do My Kids Have Too Many Toys.” I found myself agreeing with most of what he said in the article. There are a few additional things that may help parents.
The easiest way to describe how kids experience ADHD is to start snapping your fingers to a nice slow beat. Think Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Now start snapping your fingers faster, imagine that an EDM song wrapped itself in Twinkle Twinkle and started running a sprint. This is how fast your child’s brain is going on a regular basis without medication. For example: when you see them smack their sibling in the face with a pillow, naturally, you yell at them. When they turn around and say “I didn’t smack them,” you can start to understand. They’re already five million steps ahead and thinking about what they are going to do tom… SQUIRREL. Make sense?
When we ask children to clean up their room, it’s like looking at the line outside Walmart on Black Friday. It’s completely overwhelming and if your toys consist of many tiny parts (I.e. Legos or tiny doll parts), your child is most likely already feeling frustrated. This results in you asking a million times, your child becoming angry, and a two hour long meltdown.
When faced with cleaning rooms, the best option is to sit with them and organize. Put everything in it’s place. The next time they go to clean their room, give them specific instructions and one at a time. For example:
- Pick up all dirty clothes and place in hamper
- Fold clean clothes and put away
- Pick up (insert toys for specific bin)
Help them the first two to three times. Create a list of these things so they can refer to it if they get stuck or distracted. Remind them the list is there. On the next few tries, have them go in alone and pick up. When they are finished, if there are still items on the floor, it may be too much for them to handle. Remove those items from their room. Do this a few times over the next couple weeks. Every time things are left on the floor, remove those items. Eventually, your child will have only the things in their room they are able to manage. Thus, answering the question “Do My Kids Have Too Many Toys.”
Wabi Sabi Counseling 